Previously on, uh, Previously on

And there’s just 10 of the hundreds of characters that are in such a long standing series. I mean, its not like there are any bad characters out there, right?

See, if this was television, this would be called a cliff hanger. It’s to intregue you to read on, and see where the story takes you.

Of course Final Fantasy has some crap characters. The series has been going on for less than twenty years, you think they’ve all been gems?

So, in contrast, these are the people we groaned for, we cried about, we left in the airship to sit and rot. Whether it be their character, their weapons, their story, whatever, these are the people that makes the game less enjoyable.

And here we go.

10. Tidus (Final Fantasy 10)

If I am starting this list with the most irritating main character in the franchise, I must be doing something either wrong or right. Without a doubt, Tidus is the worst main character in any of the Final Fantasy titles, mainly for being an annoying little boy with the charisma of a wafer-thin mint. He’s a star player in what could possibly be most boring side game in the series, underwater soccer. And the story is essential him being a follower to a group of people, instead of a leader.

9. Quina (Final Fantasy 9)

Look, I can give it a pass for looking like the forgotten child of the Stay-Puft Marshallow man. But this creature is so irritating to use. To gather its blue magic skills, it has to eat the creatures. In order for it to work, the creature needs to be 25% of it’s health or less. So, it’s poke, eat, fail, poke, eat, fail, poke, oops just killed it. So aggrevating. And not only that, you have to go hunting for frogs in swamps. What a waste of time.

8. Sephiroth (Final Fantasy 7)

Yes. I did. I don’t like him. I used to like him. Like you, I was swoon to his cool looks, his wicked sword, and his deep, dark, demeanour. But he didn’t age well in my eyes. In hindsight, he didn’t do much as a main villain. This momma’s boy’s main accomplishments are burning down a city, and stabbing an innocent unarmed girl. That’s basically it. Those aren’t to be praised for villainous deeds, those are to be booed for the actions of a modern-day dillweed.

7. Edge (Final Fantasy 4)

Here’s a character that basically joined in at the last minute, did nothing to help with the defeat of the end bad guy, and takes full credit for doing so. His blitz spell does little in damage, and he has to throw all your hard earned items at Zeromus to be helpful. Plus his attempts at hitting on Rydia? Yeah, not cool.

6. Rikku (Final Fantasy 10)

I swear, whenever she talks, an angel takes another swig of Jack Daniels. Annoying doesn’t begin to cover the reasons why I dislike this girl. Her language makes no sense, in terms of it’s just replacing one letter for another. Seriously? And what’s with the Hot Topic contact lens? It’s not cool anymore. It wasn’t cool back then either.

5. Dark Lord (Final Fantasy Mystic Quest)

So far, I’ll bet that you think that I hated Final Fantasy 10 more than any other in the series. It’s true. But the most hated title that bears the Final Fantasy seal of approval is Mystic Quest for the S.N.E.S.. This was just a dumbed down version of the series. But after climbing all those towers, beating easy bosses and enemies, going down all towers, you finally face the big boss, the Dark Lord. Ooooh. And you cast cure on him twice and he dies. Seriously. That’s it. What a waste of time. Word to the wise, don’t make your end boss weak to cure, and most importantly, don’t make the end boss die in two shots!

4. Selphie (Final Fantasy 8) / Pinelo (Final Fantasy 12)

These two share a point on the list, mainly because they are both identical in many ways. Their bad hair, their terrible fighting styles, and the fact that they are both replaceable cogs in their respective titles. If you take them out of the stories, nothing will change. Just forgettable and lazy.

3. Those Damn Judges (Final Fantasy Tactics Advance)

All this talk of the numerical series, and no talk of the short lived gem in the series, Tactics. This was Final Fantasy turned-based strategy game. And it was fun. So when the sequel came out for the Game Boy Advanced, I was pretty excited. Then they introduced those Damn Judges. They come in and start making restrictions to the fight, to try to make it more difficult, but made it infuriating. Seriously, I can’t use potions? White Magic? Attack? I can’t attack? What the hell? They are the very definition of ruining a game, essentially making the game unplayable. Ah well, at least you can kick the crap out of them in Twelve.

2. Gau (Final Fantasy 6)

By the time you get to this point, you probably realized that the sixth installment of the series (Known to North Americans as Final Fantasy 3) is my pick for the best in the series. And one of the key reasons for that greatness is the fantastic characters that you come across in your adventures. That being said, if the game had a black eye into it, it would belong to Gau. He is just the most over-the-top-and-not-in-a-good-way person that sinks the excitement like an albatross. You want him to learn more attacks? Take him back to the Veldt and take him for walkies. He doesn’t even have a basic attack command, making him even more useless. But the big stinger of it is his optional character development story happening after the planet’s destruction. He meets his dad, but he’s insane, so nothing happens. You don’t even get anything for sitting through that unfunny situation.

1. Wakka (Final Fantasy 10)

Top spot for the worst Final Fantasy character must, without dispute, belong to the man with the dumbest name in the history of video games, period. He is the broski from hell. His voice is a mixture of the movie “Fargo” and stereotypical Newfoundland jargon. His hair is an eyesore, his outfit is an eyebleeder, his weapon of choice is a Volleyball, and he is supposed to be a star of Blitzball. And the worst part of it all, he woos the girl from the group that is the most cleavage-based. How? It’s madness.

You know, now that I think of it, all three inductees from Ten all breathe underwater in the game. Maybe I just included them based on my deep-seeded hate for Aquaman. No wait, I like Aquaman, I just hate that game.