Retro Spectacle

So there I was at my favourite place to browse through retro games, the flea market closest to my house, checking out the latest selections of classic gaming. Then it came to me, that I don’t have a game to play for the upcoming Review A Bad Game Day 2014, an annual tradition celebrating the absolute worst video games imaginable. If you recall, last year I covered the lackluster Raid at Bungeling Bay, and the year before that was the annoying Athena. And I figured I needed to find that special game. One that is worse than all the other games combined, yet such a hidden gem that not many people knew the game existed. But none of the seller’s inventory stood out to be particularly crappy in the Nintendo section, and the Super Nintendo section had mostly the games already talked about by reviewers far better and more popular than I can ever be. Even the suggestions of the store owner were either not bad, or not bad enough to signify anger fueled rantings.

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Now I am not really a history buff, or even a history aficionado. I don’t watch the History channel outside of Pawn Stars, and I got C average grades in all my history and social studies courses. So my knowledge in all things war and war related are pretty limited to the information mentioned in popular movies. That being said, I’m pretty sure there wasn’t a Bungeling Bay in any of the world wars, or anything like that. But then again, I could be wrong.

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Wow, this site has been floating around like space debris around Alpha Centuri. The problem has been my brain has been refusing to do work. “Nah”, it says. “Let’s not give an opinion on that movie you just watched, or that new game you just picked up. Let’s just give it a one word response, and continue to stare vacantly into the void”.

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Ah the future. 2191 to be exact. The air is clean, the trees are growing, and major metropolis cities are running smooth. In the not-to-distant future, the many scientists and engineers will build a super computer that will run everything, from mundane tasks to complex chores. One single large computer, placed in the centre of it all, taking care of all things great and small. What could possibly go wrong?

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